Friday, October 30, 2009

Suicidal Notes - 1 (Copycat)

I read those lines again,

Another glance and I had them all in my head,

Couldn’t believe how much it connected,

Connected to each and every single moment and thought of my life.

Feels like I am finally understood,

The book said it all,

It was meant for me, only for me maybe,

A man of so many complications, a person misunderstood.

It was the only book that went out of this world,

Showing the truth, The Raw truth.

I agreed to each one of them,

As if disagreeing would prove me and my existence wrong.

But was surprised of the ending,

A suicidal it was,

He should have fought this life,

Aint life worth a fight now!

He was wrong here,

He should have thought about others,

But who are the others anyway now.

Was he right?

The author sure was depressed,

Suicide is for the losers,

I rather fight my life,

Then conclude it.

Well the author has seen the world,

He has told all the truth,

Every word enlightens me more,

Does it?

Suicide would never be a solution to anything,

But living has never given anything but solitude,

Misunderstood by everyone,

Negative the life always have been.

He might be right about it then,

But I am sufficiently coward for this,

Would rather live it like this,

A living worth a coward’s life.

It is so confusing now,

Should I live it this way?

Can I change from this?


Maybe I don’t see people like me because they end up this way,

They knew it from the start,

I was dumb maybe to carry it forward,

Have always been anyways!

Now that I know it,

Whats my options,

Should I embrace what he says?

He made total sense to me.

Henceforth no one has to tolerate me,

Did they?

Now after this no one can prove me wrong,

Can they?

Anyway I think I got enough pills to blast myself,

Yup enough they seem,

One down, two down, three down,

Damn slow, ten down at a shot.

Now would it just put me to sleep?

Would it allow me another world?

A fairy should guide me…


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